Imposter Syndrome

Have you ever felt like your accomplishments and successes are a simple stroke of luck? That you haven’t done anything substantial to deserve them? That someday people are going to realize you’re not the person you portray you are? I know I’ve been there, multiple times. This feeling of continuous doubt of your achievements is what is called Imposter syndrome. 

People who have imposter syndrome are commonly found to have these characteristics: 

1. Continuously trying to prove to others that they are better than them. They push themselves to perfect each and every aspect of life; work, family, friends, travel, etc. 
2. They prefer to finish all the work by themselves because asking for help will make them look weaker or like a failure. 
3. If there is any task that they cant accomplish they start doubting that they are not “good enough”. They question their self-worth very often. 
4. Afraid of looking stupid in a conference room or classroom hence they try to perfect each and every skill.
5. They are striving to be perfectionists.  

These feelings usually arise from past experiences. From feeling like your grades were never good enough for your parents, having to match up to a sibling’s bling, having this feeling that to gain any kind of respect or love you need to “achieve”. 

If you can relate to these, here’s what you can do: 

1. The first step is to realize and accept that you’re an imposter. Once you start to notice these actions you will be more conscious of not engaging with these thoughts. 
2. Reframe your thoughts. Instead of feeling like asking for help will make you look weak, see that it can actually slow your team down or make you do it incorrectly. Realize that it’s okay not to be the best at everything. Truly working on your strongest suits and monetizing them will make you more successful than trying to strive to be perfect in each and every aspect. 
3. Understand that the people you look up to and admire aren’t as perfect as you think, for all you know you are better at a lot of aspects than them. Everyone goes through struggles but the way you talk to yourself can have the biggest positive impact on your decisions. 
4. Know that the goal isn’t to never be an imposter because you will doubt yourself in life but it is to slow down the process and assumptions you make for yourself at that moment and not allowing it to take over your decision-making process. 

It is very common to doubt oneself but to the point where you are self-deprecating yourself and struggling to stay afloat, it IS A RED FLAG. No job, no person, no project is worth more than your mental health. Learn to spot these flags and be conscious of how you are treating yourself and the kind of pressure you are putting.