Rajvi Bagdai Lately, I’ve been focusing on my future, on building myself up, I’ve been scavenging into things I was always scared to look into. I am trying to be the person that I’ve always dreamt of being, a confident, ambitious, gets what she wants, kind of a young lady but it hasn’t been that easy. I’m not going to blame this on Covid because it has no part in making it difficult for me but rather I only have myself to blame.
I noticed an unhealthy pattern with myself that I need to get rid of. Every step of the way I am constantly putting myself down, constantly doubting myself. If I see a gorgeous house on Instagram or Pinterest my head goes “WOW, that is my dream house”, and yet another part of me goes “I can only dream of having that house”. SAYS WHO!? Cut those people off in your life who tell you “You’re dreaming too big”, there are no dreams too big, only self-doubt and procrastination, they’re the real problem.
I realized that I’m not really allowing anyone else to put me down, I am doing that perfectly well for myself. The only thing holding me back is my self-doubt. Why can’t I have my dream penthouse in New York? Why can’t I have my dream job? Because I’m scared I’m not good enough to get it, I’m scared to fail, I’m scared I’m not doing enough! The only common line I can draw between these things is that I can change each one of them!
These don’t have to be my shortcomings, I can turn them into my strengths. If I feel like I’m short of a skill that I need for my dream job, I have to go ahead try some new courses, talk to people from that industry, learn and grow. I can solve this continuous nagging feeling of not being enough by simply getting started.
Here’s a list of things I am going to be conscious about and so should you:
- Be mindful of the people you surround yourself with.
Any individual needs to surround themselves with people who are constantly striving to be the best version of themselves. They will encourage you to do the same, motivate you, help you even, instead of people who just care about which bar you’re going to be hitting this Friday night (In a time with no Covid of course).
- BALANCE IT OUT
Having a work-life – balance is SO important. You are not going to be the person you want to be unless you learn to strike a balance between socializing and being productive. Both of these are so important for a person’s well-being and neither of them should be neglected. When it comes to this, I have noticed that it’s easier to set small goals for yourself, first thing in the morning, write down what you want to accomplish today and only at finishing the tasks at hand should you allow yourself to rest, socialize and pamper yourself.
- Consistency. Consistency. Consistency
Nothing is more important than consistency. A lot of people have been asking me how I managed to lose so much weight during covid and home workouts, well I have always been a very active person but I was never as consistent with my workouts as I am now, I have been consistent since last November I have fallen in love with this healthy lifestyle, it’s become a part of who I am. Consistency will not disappoint you, you just need to have some faith (a LOT of it actually) and the drive to make it in life for yourself.
- Realising the factors that make you doubt yourself
The first step to relieving yourself of self-doubt is knowing the source. It may be because of bad grades, wrong influences, comparing yourself to people on social media, procrastination, it can be anything at all! You can’t solve a problem if you don’t know what’s causing it, you can’t expect to get results if you don’t know what you’re doing wrong, so first figure out these triggers that make you doubt yourself and then find a way to solve them. There is ALWAYS a way, just don’t give up.
- Look for motivation and validation inside you instead of outside
Your external environment is constantly changing. There are going to be a lot of temporary people in your life and a lot of temporary places and if you associate your motivation within them, it will be gone the second they are out of your lives. You are the only constant in your life and if you decide to look into yourself for motivation and validation, that drive is going to bring you success.
I’m going to try and get out of this cycle. The only person I’m competing with is my own self – doubt and I’m sure I’m not the only one feeling this way so let us get over this fear, it’s only stopping you from doing everything you want to do and want to be, don’t get stuck in this cycle and helplessly look at someone else living the life you planned for yourself, the only difference between them and you is that they went for it, they overcame this fear and now its time you do too!
